A Lovely Commercial

The Frustrated Female is definitely more oriented towards pointing out what marketers do wrong, but I also really enjoy making note of the good things as well. I have already been a big fan of Tide's Loads of Hope program because it is cause marketing at its best. It gives disaster victim's back some of their self respect and pride by giving them clean clothes. Tide is doing what it does best; washing clothes.

I feel the same way but even more so about this Dawn commercial - also a Procter and Gamble brand. Dawn is being used in this commercial to wash the oil off small animals like penguins and otters who have been caught in oil spills. It is beautiful to watch and it doesn't leave one feeling desperately cynical about the role that Dawn is playing. Like the Tide concept before it, Dawn isn't making huge claims about the brand saving the world and preventing oil spills in the first place - although that would be nice too. Instead it is simply and beautifully showing us that it plays a significant role in helping clean up the mess afterward and rescue some of the animals that get caught in these disasters.

I find myself really liking Dawn for doing this - and yes it does tell me that it is an effective and yet gentle product at the same time - but the message is communicated so well and so indirectly that I am more receptive to it anyway.

Well done Dawn Team!

A Hot Car & The Hot Girl

I have shared this commercial for the Lexus IS Convertible, and although not every woman I have spoken to finds it as offensive as I do, I don't think any of us are inclined to 'hop into' one of them any time soon.

I know that the men who run automotive companies are deaf to the idea that women influence over 80% of all car purchases and that some of us actually earn more than our spouses which allows us to buy the convertible rather than them. Outrageous, I know. Nor am I saying as a result of this information, that the roles should have been reversed so that two hunky guys were running along beside the car and a woman was driving it - although come to think of it, that might have resulted in me liking the spot more.

What I do think, is that this commercial misses the mark. I guess it might appeal to young men - and perhaps Lexus would shoot back that this was the intent in the first place - but unfortunately, the rest of us have to watch it as well. The way I interpreted it was that the lucky guy was driving along in his cool convertible and comes across a couple of beautiful young women who are running alongside the car, just waiting to be 'picked' or 'picked up' by the driver. He decides that the first one isn't cute enough for his taste, so he drives on and chooses the second one instead. I don't know too many women who fantasize about running along the road, waiting to be picked by a guy who decides that they are cute enough to jump into his car.

I am sure that this is not exactly what Lexus wanted to say with their commercial. The problem is that even if they meant something different, it is way too open to be negatively interpreted by the hapless viewer who doesn't have the benefit of a campaign set-up from the advertising agency's account director.

Thoughts anyone?

Selling Cell Phones with Sex

The commercial I have included here for everyone's viewing pleasure is the first of two absolutely appalling T-Mobile commercials with Catherine Zeta-Jones. Firstly, let me say that I like Catherine Zeta-Jones. She has always impressed me as a good actress but also as being a level-headed, intelligent person who rose above some of the really mindless Hollywood women. So to start with I am somewhat amazed that she would even agree to do a series of commercials for a cell phone company - it seems like a real come down.

However, be that as it may, I am very disappointed that she would chose to do a series of commercials in which she so blatantly is there as a sex object. The one above has a series of professors going door to door to find out about people's cell phone habits. After the doors are all slammed in their faces and they are exposed to other, random humiliations, T-Mobile decides to send in Catherine Zeta Jones instead. She rings a guy's door bell and asks in a sex kittenish voice whether he would like a mobile makeover.

It is all so desperately stereotyped and the viewer is left imagining what the lucky guy whose door bell she rang is going to get to do with her once she enters his home. Apart from the stereotyping, the advertisers who created this campaign have to have been men, because it is a total turn off to any women who happen to be watching.

The second commercial that I saw has Catherine Zeta Jones talking to a couple in their living room. She has positioned herself for maximum sex appeal on the sofa, while the husband drools all over her and the wife looks on being a good sport about the whole thing. The final line in the commercial is the husband saying to Catherine 'I am married - well technically speaking.' Most self-respecting wives would have thrown their husbands out on the sidewalk after a humiliating remark of that type, but clearly the guys who wrote this thought that it would be funny to position Catherine Zeta Jones as the quasi mistress in this little set up. Apart from anything else, I imagine that most viewers find the whole scenario so distracting that they can't remember a word that was said about the actual cell phones.

Easy open (for others)

You know those little packets of soy sauce that you get when you get take-away sushi? The ones that contain about half a thimble full of soy sauce that once you have actually got the packet open there is hardly any left because the rest is on your fingers? Yes - those ones. Well, I don't get it because all of them have these handy dandy little arrows on them pointing to the place that you are meant to gently open the packet. Some of them even say 'easy open packet'. However, no matter how I prepare my hands - specifically by washing and drying them so thoroughly that there can't be a smidgen of grease left on them - I am still fumbling with those packets like I had dunked my hands in olive oil. I have been reduced to poking holes in the sides with the prong of a fork or jabbing them with a pencil and nothing works.

Surely there has to be an easier way to serve up soy sauce to go than putting them in these little packets. Actually, come to think of it, the slippery little packets they put ketchup and mustard in aren't much better, and they come with the added aggravation of having my daughter waiting not so patiently for me to break into them. 'Come on mom, hurry up - it can't be that difficult. Here let me.' So she grabs one of them and starts wrestling with it, usually with the same result as mine; she is hot, sweaty and frustrated but the little packet of ketchup is still firmly intact.

I mean seriously, the result is way out of proportion with the process. The process being the pawing and struggling with a hideously resistant piece of plastic for a minimum of 10 minutes. The result being obtaining a drop of ketchup, mustard or soy sauce that usually lasts about one mouthful or in equivalent time ratios - 10 seconds.

Please can someone put me out of my misery and invent a packet that really is 'easy open' - I would be eternally grateful.

Appearances Do Matter!

Okay, so maybe this is just me, but I am not sure whether I like the new layout that has been adopted by the print edition of Newsweek. I realize that it has probably been re-designed with a new layout and font due to the increasing tendency of readers to want bite sized pieces of information. Nothing too long or ardous to read and broken up with lots of pictures. In fact, I am sure that magazines feel that they have to do this in order to compete with on line sources of news and information which are in many ways more easily digestible.

However, I also realize that there is something to be said for sitting down with a good cup of tea and enjoying a really meaty news article. The master of the meaty article must of course be The Economist that has the least digestible form of news on the market. However, their articles are unfailingly good and once one sits down and concentrates, they are always worth reading.

So what has appearances got to do with all of this? Well, I have a sneaking suspicion that most Economist readers secretly enjoy reading the magazine in public places because it says 'I'm smart enough to read this incredibly dense, hard to read publication and have a global outlook to go along with it.'

So what about the new appearance of Newsweek?

Well a lot of people probably really like it because it definitely seems to make it easier to read. I on the other hand, feel somewhat offended that such a worthy publication feels the need to spoon feed me political and economic information in such a lightweight format that they clearly think that none of us have more than the attention span of a gnat. If I want to read something light weight, I can go to the supermarket and buy one of Jackie Collin's latest musings on the life of the rich and boring.

So that is my reaction. It probably sounds desperately snobby but I just can't help myself. I don't believe news should be served up in a format that caters to the shortest attention span on the planet - there are other people out there that like it to be slightly hard to read. After all, that's the point isn't it?

The One Week Discount

I am a bit of a pill popper when it comes to vitamins. I have no idea whether they are actually making me healthier/keeping me fitter/adding to my youthful aura, but if there is a link between how feverishly one believes in these things and how much they actually work, then I am on to a good thing. The downside to swallowing all these vitamins every day is that the price tag can get pretty high, which is why I am a gold card carrier at GNC. For those of you not familiar with the program, it allows you to get 20% off your purchase the first week of every month.

So you can imagine what happens. As I get to the bottom of one of my vitamin bottles I start obsessing about whether I have enough to get me through to the first week of the following month. Will I have to start cutting some of them in two to make them go further? Or find a friend who takes the same vitamins and ask to borrow a few until I can replenish my supply?

However, what usually happens is that I get so busy that I don't have the time to get to GNC in the first week of the month, so I end up having to pay full price. This happened to me this month, when I rushed into the store on the 8th of the month and tried to beg to be allowed to use my gold card since I was only one day late. The sales associate gravely told me that the promotion had ended the day before and that there were no exceptions. Damn.

So this made me ask myself why GNC limits the offer to the first week of every month anyway. I mean if you pay your annual dues to have a gold card then you are probably a loyal customer so what does it matter what day of the month you shop the store? It probably results in the majority of gold card customers flooding the store the first week of the month and then hardly darkening its doorstep for the other three weeks. Unless they are like me and find that they have annoyingly missed the first week and have to forego the discount and then they are dissatisfied shoppers anyway.

So I guess I am one of their frequent shoppers who needs this loyalty program explained to me, because I really don't understand the benefit to the shopper of this one week a month deal. In the meantime, I am still grumbling about having missed the cut off date by one day......

Robotic Service.

Firstly, let me say, that I am actually a big fan of Biscuitville. I try to stay away from cooked breakfasts, but when I do give in to temptation, they really do have excellent biscuits which you can watch being made from scratch. Sometimes, I will just get an order of scrambled eggs, which are always hot and moist - yum.

However, there is one thing that diminishes my pleasure a degree or two. Every time my daughter and I go through the drive thru they start the conversation by saying 'do you want to try a combo?' This statement, not only seems vaguely meaningless to me, but also very impersonal. We go through the drive thru at least 1-2 times a week and they know us personally at this point. When we actually get up to the pick-up window, they are always very welcoming and cheerful. They even recognize my voice - which I guess isn't too hard because of the British accent. So why still inflict the robotic 'do you want to try a combo' on me every time I go there? How about asking something a little more personal such as 'what looks good to you today?'

When I went through the drive thru most recently, I couldn't help myself asking the women at the cash register why she had to say 'do you want to try a combo?' every time anyone came through. She admitted that she hated saying it, but that Biscuitville management would really have her butt if she didn't say it. Yikes!

The whole experience left me feeling how out of touch with consumers many companies really are. Trying to force a combo down my throat - "if you don't get one this time, by golly we are going to keep asking until you do" - does not make me feel like a valued and special customer to them. There are so many things that they could ask their customers that would feel a great deal more personal and interested in providing the food that will deliver exactly against each individual customer's needs.

I don't think that it is possible to approach service in any category from a 'one size fits all' perspective - or at least that's how I see it. Hmmm.....maybe it is time for some scrambled eggs......

Is 'Being Late' a Marketing Strategy?

Okay, I admit that this is a bit off topic for the Frustrated Female, but I wanted to write about it anyway. I have made the observation that people who are generally late for meetings, appointments etc. seem to actually have the upper hand over those of us who are always nauseatingly on time. Yes, I am one of the latter group, and frequently find myself sitting at a restaurant, conference room or any other sort of table, waiting for someone else to arrive. The irony is, that although the 'on time' group should actually feel professionally and personally superior for always been so punctual, I have this sneaking feeling that the 'late group' are in the superior position, because we are the anxious ones who are waiting and they are the breezy ones who are being waited upon.

Although being late is obviously not a real marketing strategy, I wonder whether it's second cousin - playing hard to get - actually is one. After all, when it comes to many forms of goods and services, it is often the case that if something desirable is in short supply or is hard to find, it naturally makes everyone want it even more. In fact, the whole dynamic can create a whole movement behind a particular brand, product or service as people scramble to be one of the lucky few that actually have one of these wonderful things in their possession.

Take Starbucks for example. Although there are many people that still love Starbucks, it was probably at its most desirable when it was perceived as a little 'hard to get' - slightly out of reach both economically and geographically. Once everyone decided that it was a worthwhile daily treat and Starbucks popped up on every corner, it lost a little bit of its magic. Likewise, there is nothing more attractive than having someone serve a particular kind of cheese or chocolate that can only be found in a certain remote corner of the world.

So perhaps marketers everywhere - including myself - should be working out how to make their products or brands seem 'hard to get' rather than focusing on messaging that is hard sell in nature and focused on getting people to buy more.

Is Cheerios A Medicine??

I just read that the FDA are slapping the makers of Cheerios on the proverbial wrist for making advertising claims about the reduction of cholesterol. My overall reaction to this news is that this is probably a good thing, since with the cost of health care these days, I have a vision of everyone with a cholesterol problem rushing out to stock up on Cheerios rather than going to the doctor, taking some serious cholesterol medicine or even starting a proper nutritional program.

However, on reflection I realized that perhaps my reaction should be a bit more complicated than that. The positive thing about Cheerios claiming to help reduce cholesterol is that at least it is a step in the right direction when it comes to how America consumes breakfast. With 40 million people in this country qualifying as obese, and another 20 million or so being categorized as over weight, we could sure do with some help. My guess is that the vast majority of Americans eat more than a bowl of Cheerios for breakfast, with many of them tucking into large portions of bacon, eggs and pancakes. The upshot of this is that if the makers of Cheerios - motivated obviously by self-interest all the way - can get even a few of these people to start eating cereal for breakfast rather than a high fat or fried option, then we might start to see a decline in the average weight of American adults.

I think that we need some 'everyday' solutions to the myriad of health problems that we are all starting to experience due to our less than healthy lifestyles, but are tending to ignore because we can't afford to sign up for outrageously expensive monthly prescriptions. I have personally had quite a lot of luck taking natural remedies for some every day health problems - anyone heard of taking nettles for allergies? I would not dare to go as far as to say that a bowl of Cheerios even falls into the same camp as a natural medicine/remedy, but it might be a small step in the right direction We certainly need a few of those......

Being Mean Makes The Sale!

Okay this isn't exactly what I think as a customer, but I have to believe it is what a lot of the more expensive women's apparel stores believe.

My mother came to visit last week-end, and we went to a few of the nicer apparel stores in the area to try to find her a new suit for her up and coming trip to England (personally, if I didn't have to occasionally wear the odd suit to a business meeting, I wouldn't bother with them, but that's just me).

At one of these stores in particular, we ran into a whole bevy of female sales assistants who seemed to be trying to out do each other in terms of who could be meaner. It felt like they believed that the more they could make us feel priviledged for being in the store being waited on my them, the more we were likely to buy.

Does this really work for some women? It doesn't work very well for me. I am the type of woman who prefers to be waited on by someone who is relaxed, warm and welcoming and makes me feel good about being in the store. I am looking for someone I can trust and feel reassured by, rather than someone who takes one look at my poor excuse for an outfit and makes me feel inadequate.

I do know that there is a certain amount of reverse psychology in the sales process, because I have found that in my business as well. It really does seem to be the case that 'if you play hard to get' with potential clients, that they are more likely to want to work with you than if you are too keen and eager.

Okay - stop the presses. A female colleague of mine has just informed me that she used to be a sales associate on Rodeo Drive, and that she was instructed to be mean to the customers because the meaner you are, the more they buy. So perhaps it really does work in a retail environment as well. I need to think about applying this psychology to my marketing business. Who can I be mean to first?

Totally Confident I am Not

I just saw the new commercial for GM's Total Confidence Program and unfortunately it makes me realize that nothing much has changed when it comes to US automakers.

It is true that consumers, especially women, want to be able to trust and have confidence in the brands that they are giving their custom and their loyalty to, so GM has that part of the equation right. However, the rest of the equation just isn't working for me.

My perspective is that the reason why consumers lost confidence in GM is because they were incredibly short sighted and instead of building cars that consumers really needed - smaller, smarter and more fuel efficient - they continued to build the ones that the company thought would make them the most money. They also continuously shunned the idea of building cars that were really going to be more environmentally friendly in favor of those that were large and did very few miles to the gallon. The consequence of all of this bad planning, was that the company had to have a huge injection of bail out money; they have just taken another $5 billion this week.

So what do they do? They come up with something called The 'Total Confidence Program' that has nothing to do with righting any of the wrongs that have caused their problems. They have merely re-packaged some of the products and services they already had, such as a 5 year warranty and On-Star, and called them a Total Confidence Program. The campaign and the program have left me feeling that GM hasn't learned any of the lessons that it should have over the past 12 months and is just carrying on doing business the same way it always has.

I guess that I should be feeling 'totally confident' in GM at this juncture, but for some reason I am feeling 'totally unconvinced'.

There's a Man in My Room!

I just came back from a business trip in Chicago where I had the good fortune to stay at the Sofitel. This is a truly lovely hotel and one of the best I have stayed at in a long time. However, there was one small thing that bugged me, although it is a fairly consistent experience across most hotels.

Maybe it is just me, but if I order room service - especially after I have indulged in a bubble bath and put on a comfy robe - I would really prefer if room service was not delivered to me by a guy. I think that many women feel a little vulnerable when they are traveling on business alone - in fact I know that this is the case from a research study I did on female business travelers - and appreciate hotels that have good safety practices. I am certainly not saying that it isn't safe for a hotel to send a male waiter up to a woman's room for room service; I certainly have never had any problems. It is just that some of us feel that sense of vulnerability when we are are standing in a hotel room with a robe on and a guy we have never met before is standing in the same room behind a closed door.

Due to this sense of vulnerability, I find myself debating whether or not to use the 30 minutes before the food is delivered to enjoy that desirable bubble bath. Should I keep my business clothes on? Put on some armor in the form of bright red lipstick? Get out my computer so that I look businesslike and efficient? Pretend to be speaking to my husband on the phone? Aaagh.......

I would love it if a hotel asked me whether I would prefer a female server when I order room service. It would be the cherry on the cake. That step that would make me a loyalist forever. Worth thinking about all you hotel chains out there!

The Plastic Problem

Call me naive, but the crushing reality of what plastic and plastic bottles are doing to our environment and our oceans has been a bit removed from my active conscious. Well, no more. I just read a PBS article on the plastic problem and it was a bit of an eye opener. Did you know that there is an 'island' of plastic the size of Texas floating out in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean? No? Well neither did I until now. So why are companies still selling so much stuff in plastic? Many of them are trying to call themselves 'green' while at the same time continuing to exacerbate the plastic problem.

Wouldn't it be nice if a few of the large packaged goods companies really took a pro-active stance in solving this huge and frightening problem, rather than waiting until the government realizes that it has to do something to stop us literally drowning in our own garbage?

I am feeling a little hot under the collar about this and wonder whether there are things that we can do to stop this happening, apart from cutting down on the amount of plastic bottles we buy?

Does Susan's Makeover Ruin the Magic?

I just came across an article in the UK press that informed us that Susan has just spent 100 pounds ($150) on a makeover. On the one hand I am glad for her because it represents an external manifestation of her success. She is feeling good about herself, so why shouldn't she express her sense of 'feel good' with an external expression of the change that has occurred in her life. Selfishly though, I am not so sure I like it. It reminds me a little of those commercials or movies where the original was such a huge success that the producers try to build on the success by producing a sequel. The sad truth is that the sequel is never as good as the original.

I believe that a central element to Susan's success - beyond the beauty of her voice - was her complete authenticity. There was nothing fake about her and it was wonderful to see.

Anyway, I would love to hear from other people about whether her makeover is just another natural step on her road to stardom, or whether as a society, we run the risk of ruining what made everyone who saw her feel so awe inspired.

Take my survey on this page, and let me know what you think!

The Annoying Inconsistencies of Green!

I just returned from a two day business trip to New York where I stayed at a very nice boutique hotel called the Lucerne. Like so many hotels nowadays, they had a little sign in the bathroom saying that they were trying to do their part for the environment, and consequently if guests were willing to use their towels more than once to not leave them on the floor. Since I know, not only from personal experience, but also from talking to many other women, that environmental concerns are of great importance to female consumers, this should be a good thing right?

However, unfortunately the inconsistencies that exist regarding how different companies actually apply green practices, have resulted in my being more skeptical than anything else. In regards to the hotel example, that little devil on my shoulder tells me that they are really just trying to cut down on their electricity bills by not having to do so much washing. As with many other hotels, I also don't see a lot of 'green' efforts in other parts of their service and customer experience programs. Perhaps they recycle 'behind the scenes' but when it comes to disposing of bottles etc. there don't seem to be any obvious efforts being made on the recycling front.

I also recently had the experience of going to a resort in Florida that produced a shameful amount of waste without a single effort being made to allow guests to recycle bottles and cans. Those of us that recycle religiously at home, suddenly found themselves faced with the unwelcome reality that in other parts of the country, no one was making an effort at all.

I also have the same feeling of being 'tricked' when a company has non environmentally friendly products in its portfolio and then launches a supposedly 'green' brand. I immediately find myself thinking that the company is clearly launching a green brand in order to make more of the other kind of green, rather than really caring about the environment.

Okay - so having 'ranted' about the lack of consistency with environmental efforts - companies really do need to make it consistent or not do it at all - here is a great article on picking your battles when it comes to being green.

Green Article

Inspiration in a Bottle

I know that probably a million people have written about Susan Boyle's performance on Britain's Got Talent at this point, so why be the one million and first? I think because her performance is so meaningful to so many people on so many levels, that one can't help oneself.

Watch Susan Boyle here.

In the world I work in, that of advertising and marketing, the English language is so frequently misappropriated that saying that something is inspirational has become almost meaningless. Every time an advertiser or marketer calls something 'unforgettable' that then turns out to be desperately ordinary and dull, we sink a little further into a quagmire of consumer indifference.

So is it surprising that we are all almost on our knees in gratitude that we have finally been exposed to the real thing. A woman who on the outside is totally ordinary and unmemorable, opening her mouth and having pure magic come out. It is the ultimate Cinderella story and what is so extra special about it is that we don't feel compelled to rush out and change her. We want her to stay just as she is because she hasn't been transformed into something plastic and superficial by our plastic and superficial society.

If only we could bottle it and experience something as wonderous as this every day we would all be so much better off. In the meantime, I will take what I can get and just watch her performance over and over again to try and keep hold of the feelings of joy she inspires.

Go Susan!

Am I Being Greenwashed?

As a woman I am definitely into companies being environmentally friendly, and in fact over 50% of women agree that it is very important to their choice of brands and products.

Well, so far so good.

So how about one of the most un-environmentally friendly product out there; the automobile? In terms of appealing to female sensibilities, car companies are certainly moving in the right direction by talking about electric cars and reductions in emissions, but I am not sure whether to like them more or less.

One of the reasons is that I happen to know that the first electric car was invented by Scottish Inventor, Robert Anderson in 1832. So what happened in the last 180 years? Unfortunately we have been exposed to all sorts of stories including the one about how GM tried to kill the electric car about 50 years ago because it was going to undermine the profits it was making from oil driven vehicles. I also happen to know that despite all the fan fair around the launch of the Chevy Volt in 2010, as is pointed out by Robert Fargo on the truthaboutcars.com the Volt won't be a big seller, it's role will be to change perceptions. So hang on a minute. Basically, what this means is that the Chevy Volt isn't going to do anything to help the environmental or the emissions problem, it exists purely to brain wash me and my other fellow consumers into thinking better about GM.

This seems to be where a lot of companies are going wrong in how they use the environmental angle in their marketing plans. There seems to be a general perception by companies that all they have to do is to throw something out there and call it environmentally friendly, and consumers will come running. However, I beg to differ. I think that all consumers, especially women who are more into the environmental sale, want to be shown that companies really have their hearts - and not just their wallets - in the green game. Unfortunately, our perceptions aren't quite so easily swayed.

It has to be part of the mission statement, not just a sideline to the main marketing effort.

Personally, I am not buying the Chevy Volt - either literally or figuratively.

Don't Hard Sell Me Young Man!

My family went to Orlando last week for our once in a lifetime visit to Disney land. I say 'once in a lifetime' because much though we loved it, we proved not to be lifetime fanatics of the experience.

However, Disney is not the focus of my blog this week, but rather the sales process we were exposed to at the resort we stayed at. We decided that we would take advantage of being able to get half priced Disney tickets in exchange for sitting through a 90 minute presentation on the resort. Clearly they were determined that we would buy a timeshare but we were equally determined not to.

Thus we embarked upon a fairly humorous 90 minute experience.

Firstly I have to say that if we were thinking of buying, the salesperson would have inadvertently persuaded us not to. The first mistake he made was having said that the presentation would take 90 minutes, and then looking insulted when we informed him that we would be leaving after that period of time. He was clearly used to saying that it would be 90 minutes and then holding his hapless customers hostage for an indefinite period of time until they signed on the dotted line. It clearly never occurred to him that we might be trying to use one of those Disney tickets in order to make the most of the rest of our day.

The second mistake he made was talking almost exclusively to my husband – a real ‘no, no’ when it comes to selling to women. Women have very sensitive antenna to being ignored in favor of their male cohorts, and I am an extreme case. My husband knows this about me, so he kept glancing nervously in my direction, while I made obnoxious comments to try and annoy the sales person. He clearly didn't know that a much more successful sales strategy is to give the woman over 50% of your attention; and she will like you a great deal more and be a more effective ally in trying to convince her husband to buy whatever it is you are trying to sell. Thirdly, he might have been able to win me over if he had spent the time to find out how I like to spend my time on vacation and where are my preferred destinations. He could have then made his sales strategy far more personally relevant. Instead, he couldn't wait to get out his calculator and charts to show the great deal we would be getting. This was a mistake because like most women, I immediately glazed over. He was making the mistake of selling me the price rather than selling me the experience - the rest off my short attention span floated out the window. The nail was finally driven into the coffin when the salesperson told me that we had to decide right there or else ‘no sale’. Women almost universally hate the ‘hard sell’ approach. If you aren’t comfortable giving her some time to think about what you have to offer – in the case of large ticket items – then you probably won’t make the sale at all.

Well, true to form, we didn't buy, although I am still a little worried that the salesperson is going to appear by my bed in the middle of the night, waving a contract and trying to take back the Disney tickets.

The $4 paper bag!

Last Saturday afternoon I had a delightful time taking my daughter and a friend to the cinema to see a film. We were seeing The Pink Panther 2 and it was actually very funny.

Unfortunately, the outing was slightly marred for me in the fact that I was asked to pay $4 at the popcorn counter for an empty paper bag. The fiasco started when I ordered one large popcorn for all of us to share. However, the verdict was split on whether we should indulge in the extra butter or not; the thinner member of the party wanting nothing to do with the greasy stuff, while the more robust participants were more of the 'bring it on' mindset. So I decided to keep the peace by splitting the popcorn in two, so that butter could be safely applied to only half the bag. I returned to the counter and asked for an empty bag in which to transfer 50% of the popcorn.

Much to my amazement, the boy behind the counter started to look shifty, and shuffled off to confer with his manager - over a paper bag for goodness sake. The manager then returned with the counter boy (was I about to be hauled off in handcuffs?), and quietly told me that he couldn't give me a bag without the popcorn in it. I proceeded to say that I would pay for it and was promptly told that it would be $4, only $1 less than a full bag. His tone of voice also indicated in no uncertain terms that he was counting on me not turning into a crazed housewife and flail around the theater, demanding my bag.

So now I hate The Grand Theaters. Just think that they could have won over an avid fan with $4 - who would then have spread the word to more potential fans of this great destination. Instead they have an avid enemy who will also gleefully be spreading the word about the ridiculously poor service she got at the hands of a monstrously short sighted business policy.

Oh well....

The End of Shame?

About a week ago I saw a commercial for the Mitsubishi Lancer on television and guess what the tag line was? 'The End of Global Blanding'. Once I got over the shock of having heard this incredibly stupid statement, I then had to ask myself how they could have been blind to how inappropriate it is.

Firstly, it is a message that is almost guaranteed to alienate a large part of the female population (not that most automobile companies are that interested in their female consumers). Women on the whole are concerned about the environment and what global warming will mean to their lives and more importantly the futures of their family members. Although there is some skepticism out there regarding 'green washing', for the most part women appreciate companies that seem to be doing something to help with the environmental crisis. Clearly this is not the case with Mitsubishi. Not only is Mitsubishi not doing anything to help the environment, but it is actually making fun of the problem.

Secondly, it makes Mitsubishi as a company look stupid and superficial. Most people want to buy brands and products from companies that at least appear to share their values. I can't imagine that anyone except perhaps teenagers would think that making fun of global warming is really appropriate. For most people, the personality that Mitsubishi conveys through the use of this line is 'trite, small minded and superficial'. I bet that wasn't part of the idea when they came up with the tag line.

I think that Mitsubishi might want to consider having a serious talk with its agency - at least ask them to re-think their advertising idea. I doubt that 'the end of global blanding' is going to help them sell too many more Lancers.

Make Up Madness

I have been dying to write on my blog about the experience of going to the cosmetic counter in a department store. I know that most women have experienced it and some probably even like it - but I am not one of those people! I am a Sephora fan. I like to be able to go to a store and step inside something that feels like Aladdin's Cave. I want to be able to wander around the store in a state of imagined invisibility and play with all the different brands, products and colors. I don't want to be disturbed until I am pretty near the end of my decision making process and then maybe someone can check in with me.

This unfortunately is not the experience I get when I go to the cosmetic counter in a department store. If I decide that I want to treat myself to some new make-up and I want something a little more special than the drugstore variety, I will plan a trip to the department store. This is definitely a 'love/hate' decision. On the one hand, I love the idea of indulging in a whole new set of high priced make-up that I can covet and keep beautiful in a little black velvet bag forever - in principle anyway. On the other hand, I have a visceral loathing for the women who work behind these counters. It isn't their fault - they are only doing what they are told, and undoubtedly if I was in their position (working on commission), I would be pretty pushy too. This doesn't negate that it is a terrible experience. You only have to skulk up to one of the counters and put your pinky finger on a lipstick and you are mowed down by a complete heard of beauticians. You don't have time to breath, think or luxuriate in the shopping experience(a very important part of spending in excess of $100 on an indulgence such as make-up and face cream). Sometimes I am so annoyed that I actually slink away again without buying anything - even though I had my heart set on a large and irresponsible purchase.

So ultimately I can't understand why these large cosmetic companies don't modify their sales strategies a little. Give people a little room to play and fantasize. Let them work themselves into the mood to buy rather than forcing it on them. I for one, would definitely be a better - and more extravagant customer!

Selling Wishful Thinking!

I went to get my hair cut on Saturday. I'm not one of those women who really luxuriate in the experience - I am more of a 'get it over with' kind of girl. However, I am as susceptible as the next person to what I call 'Hairdresser Talk'. Hairdresser talk is the same kind of thing that you get at the dentist, when the hairdresser/dentist in question points out to you all the bad thinks about your hair/teeth and consequently what you need to do to rectify them.

I am convinced that it is all the hairdresser talk that makes me dread getting my hair cut. I have thick, frizzy hair that I determinedly try to make curl rather than frizz because the alternative - a thick wedge of artificially straightened hair - is too dreadful to imagine! I treat it pretty well if I may say so myself; it gets washed and conditioned every day, I scrunch in extra conditioner when it is drying and it never goes near a hair dryer. I do admit to coloring it at home but I have a handy little comb applicator that keeps the evil chemicals on my roots only.

However, all this care and attention still doesn't protect me from the hairdresser talk. It usually starts with an innocuous question like 'what type of conditioner do you use?' and ramps up to 'your hair is really dry and frizzy.' Well - duh. I have kind of known that ever since I was old enough to care what my hair looked like and envy all my friends their straight, shiny locks.

Firstly, I have to admit that I would be much more inclined to rush to make my next appointment if the hairdresser told me what beautiful hair I had - a little white lie goes a long way. Secondly, I know that I am now in for the hard sell on the outrageously expensive hair products that line the wall behind the reception desk.

The worst part of all though is that I fall for the sell every time. I must have 50 discarded wonder shampoos and conditioners from various trips to the hair salon hidden under my sink. Somehow though, this doesn't stop me from shelling out a week's salary to buy the latest new anti-frizz, super-moisturizing wonder product.

So it makes me ponder whether this is a successful selling strategy or not. I mean it works, in that most of the time I buy something I don't really need (I always go back to the same tried and true products I was using before). On the other hand, I usually end up feeling annoyed about the whole thing which may not be good for long term customer loyalty.

Oh well - my hair looks just the same as it always does!

What a surprise.

Where is the Tom Boy Apparel?

My daughter is a 9 year old tom boy. Not a really extreme tom boy, but a girl who definitely doesn't like to wear anything pink or frilly. Nor does she like wearing things that are covered with Hannah Montana motifs. The combination of these two preferences means that there is hardly anything that she would consider wearing in the girl's departments in stores.

So I have to ask - am I alone? I find it hard to believe that I am the only one with a child that would prefer not to be dressed as Barbie. I feel that girls are still being stereotyped by retailers and apparel manufacturers as 'girly girls'. Sweet little things made of sugar and spice with bows in their hair.

This leads me to ask whether retailers aren't brainwashing our daughters from birth. How can girls grow into strong, independent women with their own sense of individuality and style if all of them have to wear pink and lavender up to the age of about 14?

Forcing them to shop in the boy's department seems to be a signal that if you want to avoid being a girly girl, you have to pretend you are a boy. This doesn't really work for me either. My daughter doesn't want to look like a boy either.

Anyone else have this problem and why don't retailers address this need?

Well, girls and boys - how do we all feel about Starbucks offering value meal pairings? Is this a good thing because Starbucks is responding to the state of the economy and allowing its fans to still indulge but at a more affordable price? Or is it a bad thing because going to Starbucks means that you are treating yourself to something special and you expect it to cost more?

Personally, I am in the latter camp. However, that doesn't mean that Starbucks couldn't still satisfy my need for thriftyness by 'adding value' to their proposition rather than offering me a discount.

I have always felt that the concept of premium brands maintaining their equity by adding value to their brands rather than discounting them, has been an interesting point of consideration. There are certain brands that have a considerable amount of their appeal in the perception of superior quality which results in a higher price. So much so, that if we were to be offered a Gucci bag for $29.99 we might find ourselves rejecting it because the equation just didn't add up. Gucci and discount pricing just don't go together. However, if a brand like Gucci where to offer 'added value' instead, such as a $50 gift certificate to put against your next Gucci purchase, it would seem quite in keeping with the brand and extremely desirable.

I would hypothesize that the same dynamic is at work with the Starbucks brand. I have always liked the added value that Starbucks offers with its free drink coupons - a nice touch. If they found a way to do more of that - perhaps offering every 30th customer a free coffee - that would feel like a good fit with the Starbucks brand. However, offering value meals just doesn't seem right for the brand. It is too McDonalds - for me anyway.

What Not To Do When Mouse Is On The Menu

I heard a news story on CNN yesterday, that would have been almost funny if it wasn't so sad. A woman was interviewed who held up the dead mouse that she found in her food at a local Chinese restaurant called Mr. Linn's. As a service provider, what do you do when a service infraction comes along that is as monumental as a customer finding a mouse in her dinner?

Well, the first thing you don't do is kick her out of the restaurant and threaten her. You also don't start claiming that she must have put the mouse in the food herself. After all, I am sure that there are a lot of middle aged women around who can't wait for the right opportunity to sneak a dead mouse into a restaurant and put it in their food. A teenager out for some laughs maybe, but otherwise - no.

So what does a service provider or a retailer do to make amends and limit the damage to their business?

Firstly, they apologize profusely - even if they don't think that whatever happened was really their fault(unlike the mouse incident). I have always found that a genuine apology goes a really long way to making things better, but it is amazing how hard some people find it to do. I always look at the other side of the coin and ask myself 'what is the downside of apologizing' and I usually can't come up with anything.

Next they state very categorically that they are going to do everything they can to not only rectify the situation but to make sure that it doesn't happen again. This is important, because women are often more inclined to look at the big picture and wonder if this is likely to happen again to some other hapless customer.

Thirdly, they make a goodwill gesture - such as a gift card or a free meal. This is really important. It can mean a lot to the customer that the store is willing to compensate them for their experience, while at the same time, not really costing the store that much. Women are easily wooed by small but meaningful gestures that can head something worse happening down the line.

So don't make the mistake that Mr. Linn made. If a customer finds a mouse in her mince (so to speak) own up and admit you made a mistake. It will be a lot less painful in the long run.

Personally, I could have found it in myself to feel sorry for Mr. Linn except that he was so rude and belligerent that I ended up hoping he would go out of business!

There you are then.....

Superbowl Ads - Still Not Much For Us Gals!

To give credit where credit is due, there were more entertaining ads that weren't so testosterone laden this year - more gender neutral I guess you could say. Of course, I adored the Budweiser Clydesdales, especially the one in which the Clydesdale rescues his love from the circus. However, having said that - and I don't mean to be petty - but all the horse protagonists in the commercials were guys! I also laughed my head off at the eTrade commercial - still two boy babies I might add - and the little African American guy who sings. Other winners as far as a female audience is concerned, were the Pedigree spot for dog adoption. They took an extremely clever and unusual approach by using 'unusual pets' and the havoc they cause as a juxtaposition for the relative normalcy of getting a dog. Then I can't resist talking about the Cheetos spot. It is actually the only spot out of 50 in which a woman is the main protagonist and comes across as smart and witty. I love the marketers for Cheetos for actually producing a commercial in which one of the woman was more than a stereotype - it probably got my vote for the best ad.

Having said that, there were some that were truly cringe making and highly derogatory when it came to how women were portrayed - take Godaddy.com as an example. Four big breasted women appearing in a court of law to tell the judge whether they have 'enhanced' or not. I mean, give me a break. I know that the joke at the end was that one of the women had enhanced her computer image through the use of Godaddy, but I was so annoyed by that time that I had already mentally shut down. Yes - I know that this is Godaddy's strategy and I should just get over myself, but I wonder how guys would have liked the self same commercial with four men talking about whether their 'you know whats' had been enhanced.

In the Taco Bell and Teleflora ads, the women were just foils for the jokes - not particularly offensive but not particularly aspirational either.

So yet again, I have to say that I am waiting for a round of Superbowl Ads that make me really sit up and say 'these guys know how to market to women'! So far, I am out of luck.

The Shame of American Express

I have to admit that I have always been a bit of a sucker when it comes to the cache associated with having an American Express Card. As a marketer myself, I know that I have been taken in by very clever marketing that makes its card holders feel like exclusive club members. Very clever and very effective.

So imagine how disappointed I was in the brand when I read the following paragraph:


"In some instances, if it (American Express) didn’t like what it was seeing, the company has cut customer credit lines. It laid out this logic in letters that infuriated many of the cardholders who received them. “Other customers who have used their card at establishments where you recently shopped,” one of those letters said, “have a poor repayment history with American Express.”

I could hardly believe my eyes. American Express was cutting customers' credit lines because they shopped at the same place as someone who defaulted on their repayments. How could they possibly do something so ludicrous? Severing relationships with perfectly good customers because there was a slim chance that in the future they just might default on a payment?

Instantly, my love affair with American Express ground to a halt. All the good will that I had felt towards them over the years, vanished in an instant. Luckily for American Express I don't have a card with them at the moment, or I would be canceling it on the spot.

They obviously completely failed to see the damage that this would cause to their brand and that the 400 or 500 clients they might have sent such ill conceived correspondence to, would soon turn into many thousands if not millions of people who knew about it - word of mouth guys, remember?

Barbie is Clearly Into the Botox!

I just read an article called 'Bring on the Botox - Barbie Hits 50'. The article focused on all the celebrations that were taking place to celebrate her 50th birthday, but to my mind one significant thing was missing. An iconic Barbie to celebrate her coming of age that looked like a stunning 50 year old! I can see that to some people that might be a little 'icky' - after all we are so used to seeing Barbie looking like an impossibly thin 19 year old, but still it could have been a big hit. I am not saying make her wrinkly and squishy, after all there really are some amazing looking 50 year olds - but rather celebrate the joys of becoming 50 and perhaps even partner with a company like Dove that has embraced the use of 'real women' in its advertising.

In my personal opinion, it would have made Barbie seem more real and approachable, rather than a left over icon of the 1950's where women had to be perfect in every way.

The invisible Rebate!

I am dying to meet someone who has actually received a rebate from a cell phone company. Well, perhaps I should amend that to say anyone who has received a rebate without having to scream down the phone at the people in charge of handing out the rebates! You have to admit that it is a great sales gimmick. You go to the cell phone store and they quote you an incredibly attractive price on the phone after you have received your invisible rebate. In the back of your mind you realize that you still have to pay the full price up front but it won't be so bad once you get 50% of your money back.

So you pay up and off you go with your fancy new phone. Now I have to admit that a couple of times I have forgotten to even fill out the rebate form - something I am sure that the cell phone companies are counting on. However, there have been at least 2-3 times when I have laboriously filled the thing out thinking 'I'm going to make them give me the rebate this time'. Off it goes in the mail and then I forget about it (this is something that I think the cell phone companies are also hoping happens).

So, perhaps twice over my relatively long history of cell phone ownership, I have bothered to follow up. After a good hour on the phone with the rebate center I am near screaming point. Eventually I get someone on the phone who mumbles that it must still be in their system and to try back in another couple of weeks. You have to ask yourself 'is it worth it?' The benefit of the rebate seems like some long distant memory compared to the benefit of staying sane. Staying sane requires that I no longer have long, painful conversations with the rebate center at the cell phone company.

So they win! No rebate for me - again. Let's be honest here - this is a great sales tool. The invisible rebate. It get's me every time.

The Novelty of Lay Away

Everywhere I go, I see stores offering Layaway Plans - something that almost vanished until the economy started to go south. What a novel idea. We have to regularly put some money against the item we want to purchase rather than just shoving it on a credit card.

When I was down in Mexico a few years ago, my husband and I got sucked into listening to a very convincing sales pitch for a time share at a five star resort. We asked if we could return to North Carolina and think about it and were told 'no'. The sales person was even transparent enough to mention that 95% of their sales were made on the spot and that if potential customers went away to think about it, they inevitably decided against buying it. After a mere 30 seconds of second thoughts, we went ahead anyway. Put it down to the sun and a couple of tasty margeritas. Oh well.

If you apply the same dynamic to the difference between layaway and credit, we all would probably buy 50% less stuff. Shopping is often a slightly frenzied activity of seeing something and feeling like you have to have it - right now! Putting it on a credit card allows you to have it right now and worry about the credit card statement later. Putting something on layaway means that you have to adopt a sense of discipline and recognize that you are not going to get the item for quite a while - or at least until you have done some serious saving.

I think that stores are smart to offer layaway again now that everyone is feeling the economic pinch. However, I wouldn't be surprised to find that they aren't selling as much, now that people have the chance to go away and think about whether they really need the item that they are planning to purchase. Defaulting on the layaway is probably cheaper than paying off the credit card bill and accompanied with a few bonus 'that was a lucky break' emotions.

I wish I could have put that time share on layaway because then we could have had a moment to regain our sanity when we returned home.

Liquidation Sale Nonsense

The average American consumer is pretty used to sales these days. Most recently, both before and after Christmas, consumers were able to go to stores and expect discounts of 40%, 50% and even 60% off. So knowing that this is most consumers' frame of reference, what is it with these liquidation sales? I am very sorry for all the people who work at a company that is going out of business - it is very scary and disruptive all around. However, when retailers go out of business it seems like the next step is to announce a liquidation sale, which most people flock to in the hope of getting a bargain that they couldn't get anywhere else.

However, my experience with liquidation sales is that by the time they offer you a discount worth considering, all that's left to buy is a few store fixtures.

My husband and I foolishly decided to try our luck at the Circuit City liquidation sale on Saturday - us and a few thousand other people who live in the area. As we were pulling into the parking lot, I observed that most people were leaving empty handed - not a good sign. Anyway, we still went in - once a lemming, always a lemming. Not only were they only offering discounts of 10% - hardly worth getting out of bed for - but it seemed like they had put up the prices in order to offer the supposed 10% price break.

The whole thing was so frustrating and such a waste of time that the only rationale that I could come up with was that there is a 'liquidation handbook' out there somewhere that says 'offer your poor, hapless customers 10% for the first couple of weeks, and then when they are on the point of giving up, go to 20%' and so on and so forth.

Having said that I guess that someone out there hits the liquidation sales at just the right moment so that they get the best merchandise for the lowest price, but it is never me.

Could someone explain to me how to get something out of a liquidation sale that is more than a bad headache?

What's a 'Missy'?

I was in conversation with a female buddy of mine earlier today and we started comparing notes regarding the way that most apparel retailers name their different women's clothing departments. Our conclusion - most retailers are desperately out of touch with the female mindset.

For a start, who wants to be thought of as a 'missy'? It reminds me of an old black and white movie in which a crusty grandfather says to his granddaughter 'you mind yourself little missy'. Or words to that effect. It makes no sense whatsoever, and rather than encouraging women into the department, we find ourselves sidling in and hoping no one sees us.

A more sensible name for this 'average sized' department would be 'womens', however this label now seems to have been handed to plus sized women. But they aren't happy either. Research has shown that women who do wear larger sizes don't want to be segregated off into a dark corner of the store with a large fluorescent arrow pointing down that says 'fat women shop here'. I mean good grief! Most women, whatever their size want the same range of quality styles and designs that are well made and comfortable. Old Navy is an example of a store that has very cleverly pursued a strategy of not deviding up juniors, womens/missy and womens/plus size. They have a range of styles that you can get in everything from an XS to an XXL. Good thinking Old Navy. No one has to slink off to a dusty corner this way.

Okay, so back to the department naming discussion. The department name 'juniors' is also horribly inappropriate. Most teenagers and young twenties that I have come across are dying to be seen as mature and grown up. They don't want to think of themselves as a 'junior', and why should they? Their male equivalents don't have to shop in a 'juniors' department. In fact, speaking of which 'junior' seems more appropriate to young boys than to young girls - wasn't there a young boy in a Leave it to Beaver type movie that was called Junior. Perfect - let the guys have the name. We give it up with pleasure.

So what's my solution? Copy Old Navy. Have different collections in the store represent different fashion needs - corporate, party, casual etc. - but leave our relative sizes out of the equation. We all want to shop together, just like we do everything else together - regardless of our size.

The One Item Sale!

I was driving along the road on Saturday morning and I saw a sign outside a home that I was approaching. It had all the characteristics of a Garage Sale sign but when I got closer I saw that it said 'Lazy-Boy Recliner' for Sale. Hmmm....I thought - the one item garage sale. Which got me thinking about the whole science of choice. I realized that if there had been many items for sale I might have stopped to have a browse, and I might have bought the Lazy-Boy. However, since there was no choice and no opportunity to browse, I had little desire to stop. I am inclined to believe that although many articles have been written in the past few years about the fact that consumers are now faced with an over-abundance of choice, that in reality we rather like it. At Factor 9 - my marketing to women group - we have identified one of the factors that affects a woman's product and brand choices as what we call 'the find'. This is all about our desire to not just buy an item, but actually go through the process of searching out just the right thing. Many people finding this searching part of the process quite exhilarating, and if we are denied this part of the overall process because there isn't a large enough selection to choose from, we will often decide to buy elsewhere. So I personally, am not convinced that there can be too much choice, especially for women. As long as the products and brands have a clear brand identity and are laid out in a way that is pleasing to the eye, I tend to have the belief that 'the more choice the better.'

The Science of Returns!

Having just returned from the holidays, the issue of 'returns' is fairly top of mind. Not that it dominates every waking moment, but just that it is capable of putting a damper on an otherwise rather fun time of year. Not having actually worked directly for a major retailer, I have no hard data to back this up, but my guess is that handling returned merchandise is fairly near the bottom of most stores' priority list, since their main focus is getting merchandise out of the store rather than taking it back.

However, I believe that when it comes to really making a retail brand appealing to women, far more emphasis should be placed on making returns an easy and stress-free experience. Women are far more likely to take note when a store 'solves a problem' for her without making it difficult, than they are when they are in the process of making a regular transaction.

One of the retailers that I had to make returns to over the holidays made me stand in line twice. Firstly, I had to stand in the freezing cold foyer of the store while they logged my merchandise into a mini computer and created a sticker to put on the things I was bringing back. It took ages and there was a near uprising in the line caused by the universal sense of frustration at the antiquated process. Once one had dragged oneself through this initial line, one then had to stand in another line at customer service. The whole thing nearly put me off ever going back to the store for anything.

Retailers take note - making it easier to bring stuff back, makes women more likely to buy more stuff next time!